How to Survive Vegas
Whats up everybody!!! Check your bank account, calendar, and warn your girlfriend because you are going to VEGAS BABY!!! This is the complete survival guide for Vegas.
Hotels: Let’s face it… The only time you are going to be in the room is to pound beers, change, and sleep. So don’t shell out the big bucks for a place you are going to spend 4 hours a night anyway… if that. Figure out how many people are going to be going with you and don’t pay more than $50 a night per person. By per person I mean… you book the hotel for two people in one room… and then proceed to cram as many of your friends into the room as possible.
It is inevitable that someone in the group will be lost at some point throughout the trip (whether they found a girl and needed some alone time… couldn’t find the hotel room or couldn’t even get out of the hotel/casino that the club/bar/or gambling. So obviously the cheaper the hotel room the better.
Gambling: Stick with what you are good at. If you know how to play blackjack, poker, or craps do it. If not you can just throw your money away on roulette or the slots. Remember when you gamble you drink for FREE. That means that you spend $10 less at the bar. Trust me it adds up.
Anyway, to minimize your losses my biggest tip, if you do decide to do anything, is speed roulette. Basically you sit down at a screen and place your bets by touching the screen. Normally I put down $100 to $200 from the start. Then I pick 21 to 25 of the numbers with either 50 cent bets or $1 bets for each number. Basically the idea behind it is you cover two thirds for the numbers and give yourself the best chance of winning each time. Once the ball lands and the screen tells you to place your bets just hit the button to replay the same numbers. This makes it easy for you to scope out the scene for girls, the party, and the drink lady… after all you are gambling so you might as well get free drinks.
Preparing yourself: Get as much sleep as possible for the 7 days prior to your long weekend because let’s face it… no party the week prior is going to be worth losing sleep and being tired for Vegas.
Prepare the wardrobe: Button up shirts, nice jeans and either nice pair of fashionable sneakers or boots for the clubs. For the day bring graphic tees or t-shirts that look fashionable (after all you aren’t going to pick up the MILF’s in Vegas looking like Larry the school boy wearing a Lebron James Jersey and baggy jeans). Also, Bathing suits are a must because there are a couple of pools you want to hit up if you are going to want to check out. I.E. the topless pools or “Rehab” which is the crazy pool party at the Hard Rock. Also, remember that Vegas is one of the cities where you can be anybody you want to be. Don’t feel bad about lying to anyone that you are the “silent partner” of some fortune 500 company. If you know another language say you are from another country. If you don’t know a language… Say you are from another country. Let’s face it… in Vegas everyone lies about who they are. I mean it is “SIN CITY”.
Clubs: Check out some of the online sites of to get into the VIP. Usually it’s around $100 per person but includes a limo ride to the club, VIP entrance (no lines), and table service. Also if you tip the driver of the limo pretty good you can sometimes get the driver to pick you up after the club lets out. I mean if you were hitting on a girl that night who is torn between whether to go home with you or her friends I’m pretty sure you are good to go if you are jumping in a limo back to your hotel… and if she does go home with you… you better have a hotel on speed dial to quickly book your own room.
After Party: For those of you that want to keep the party going after the club normally you can talk to the guy out front of the hotel, the one hailing cabs, about getting a cab to the strip clubs. Also, talk with the people around the hotels holding notebooks asking what you are doing tonight. Most of the times you just throw them like a 10 spot and they will give you cards for a free entrance and 2 free drinks inside the strip club. See what happens is the strip clubs have an understanding that they will pay for the cab ride and then with the card you get in free and don’t pay for your drinks… because let’s face it you are already wasted… you just want to keep yourself going a little. The only thing you really have to pay for the rest of the night is the cab ride back and of course the tips and any other kind of activity you want to pay for.
Walking: Its cool to walk around during the day just to see the sites… but in the summer getting from one end of the strip to the other… maybe you want to think about taking a cab. Walking through the endless mazes called casinos for air-conditioning turns a 2 mile walk into a 5 mile walk. Also don’t walk from the strip to the Hard Rock Casino unless you want your trip to include a robbery… but I like to keep my money for craps.
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